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White Chicks
2004 - PG-13 - 105 Mins.
Director: Keenan Ivory Wayans
Producer: Shawn, Marlon, and Keenan Ivory Wayans
Written By: Xavier Cook, Andy McElfresh, Michael Anthony Snowden, Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans, Keenan Ivory Wayans
Starring: Shawn and Marlon Wayans, Brittany Daniel, Jaime King, Eddie Velez
Review by: Joe Rickey

Halloween must be right around the corner.
An incessantly vulgar and bathroom humor filled attempt at farce, ‘White Chicks’ is one dumb film. With ‘White Chicks’ the Wayans trio (director Keenan Ivory, actors Marlon, and Shawn) have reached a low point in their respective careers. Whereas the first two ‘Scary Movie’ films were brash and vulgar, at least they had the idea of being film spoofs to fall back on; not to mention that the films they were spoofing were full of material ripe for comedic purposes. ‘White Chicks’ is vulgar just for the sake of being vulgar; insulting one’s intelligence much of the time.

FBI agents Kevin and Marcus Copeland (Shawn and Marlon) are perennial screw-ups and the butt of many jokes among their fellow agents. They continually falter when it comes to apprehending criminals; usually endangering innocent civilians while simultaneously failing to get the bad guy(s).

Needless to say, they jump at the chance to accept a mission where all they have to do is escort two rich socialites to a hotel for safekeeping because of a suspected kidnapping/assassination plot. Basically, they are to play babysitter to the Wilson sister socialites; two very stuck-up girls modeled no doubt after the infamous Hilton sisters. The two agents then make the decision to go undercover as the aforementioned sisters as a way of catching the criminals in the act. The process of doing so requires an extensive make-up job that nonetheless looks about as unconvincing as one could expect.

A film like ‘White Chicks’ inherently requires the viewer to suspend their disbelief as the two brothers look nor sound anything like the sisters they’re impersonating. Instead, they sound like men that have just inhaled too much helium and they look like albino creatures from outer space. Even so, the film is just not funny. In fact, the way they look and sound are about the funniest portions of the film and even these two gags get tiresome rather quickly. The film overindulges the viewer in fart jokes and other forms of bodily humor; all forms of comedy that lack wit and/or sophistication.

The film also suffers from pacing that could charitably be called awkward, as the plot progresses in fits and starts; far from the intended smooth transitions from scene to scene. Director Keenan Ivory Wayans seems content to drag the parade of dreck on for as long as he wishes. Where’s judicious editing when you need it?

The performances are on par with the material, which is to say that they are terrible. Shawn and Marlon both overact; never even attempting to act in a convincing manner and instead become just plain annoying.

The likes of Brittany Daniel (‘Club Dread’) and Busy Phillips (‘Home Room’) flail about, no doubt trying to make sense of how they got themselves into this mess of a film.

In the end, maybe a film such as ‘White Chicks’ is a good thing in a perverse sort of way because it makes one appreciate even more comedies that are actually funny; such as ‘Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story.’
Movie Guru Rating
Offensive and completely without value.  Should never have been released.
  0 out of 5 stars

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